Well, it's fucking 2021 and shocker, things are still shitty as ever but hey, at least we still got video games. Oh, I don't mean the shit they're churning out these days according to "global standards" (aka whatever China will allow). I'm pretty much resigned to sticking with games made up to 2020 at this point except for maybe the occasional Falcom game here and there. Fortunately, there's plenty of games on my backlog so let's play some classics from the good ol' PC Engine: Cosmic Fantasy.
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| Stop peeping over the Great Firewall, China! |
Yeah, I know, I know, same ol' gripes. Even I'm getting tired of my own blog. Still, the last thing I want to do is to write about games in-depth like Hardcore Gaming 101 or something. I would think most real gamers would just prefer to play the damn game instead of reading some lame blog about it. Maybe I'll try some pro gaming journalist tactics and find some potentially transphobic dialogue that needs to be wiped off the face of the planet.
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| 16 years old but at least no gender is specified here |
By all accounts, Cosmic Fantasy is a pretty mediocre RPG. It plays like one of those super barebones, fap PC RPGs such as Dragon Knight except without the breastasees. Speaking of characters that might identify as a girl (not that I would dare to assume), Saya is the only other party member that can fight despite that motorcycle robot and others who supposedly join your party. The Sega CD version seems to have added having more than two characters in your party but I don't know if I'm going to ever bother playing this again.
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| Why don't you DO something, motorcycle mouse? |
However, despite the bare bones mechanics, it's still an extremely impressive technical showcase of the PC Engine CD using animated cutscenes with voiced dialogue. Along with Tengai Makyou Ziria, it must have been exciting to see in early 1990, when the competing consoles were just the Famicom and Mega Drive.
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| Look at that |
These days, I'm much more appreciative of the freedom developers had to umm "innovate" with games like this even though I woudn't say this one is a great game. Nowadays, it seems we have all this fancy technology only for it to go completely to waste due to racist coporate policies and the latest social media rage fit. Sometimes, you just want a simple lighthearted RPG story with maybe a hot spring scene thrown in for fun. Is that too much to ask nowadays? Yeah, apparently it fucking is.
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| Yeah, yeah, another DQ clone |
What, should I talk about the game? I mean, there was that one part of the story where you probably want to grind before Saya leaves the party temporarily for story reasons. The items get kind of ridiculous near the end with how many elixers you get but really, there isn't much to say.
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| I stocked up on these Camp Capsules for nuthin |
Score: 2.5 (CONTENT WARNING: Full nudity screenshow below!!!) out of 3
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| Sike! You perv! |
0 - Awful
1 - Bad and not worth your time
2 - Has some flaws but still enjoyable
3 - An average enjoyable experience
4 - A great game
5 - Masterpiece of a caliber only found very rarely
