In search of GOTY for 1989

While us Americans in 1989 were enjoying the last good Indiana Jones movie (you know, before the aliens anal probed the series), in Japan, the next generation of gaming was heating up with PC Engine picking up momentum and the MEGA DRIVE's first full year on the market. Nintendo however continues to dominate with the Famicom in the middle of its lifecycle while the Disk System started to wind down with only 20 releases. No worries, Nintendo had a new entry up their sleeve: portable gaming.

GAME BOY

If you're old like me, you might have at one point played one of those shitty Tiger Electronics sad excuse of pretending to be a game. Ignoring unplayable shit like that, it's safe to say the GAME BOY was the first portable gaming handheld that had a rich and actually fun library.

Yay, you can still buy this shit (why though?)

Despite never owning a NES nor a Genesis as a kid (no matter how much I begged and cajoled), I did have access to the GAME BOY thanks to my older sibling's arubaito money. She got it for herself but I um... "borrowed it" and played it for way longer than she probably ever did. Ah, the nostalgia of playing Tetris with my buddy head-to-head almost literally with that short ass link cable. I watched the space launch and the other ending so many times, seeing it again immediately brings back those nostalgia tears. I never did figure out what the fuck launching into space had to do with lining up blocks but kids don't sweat the details.

Plot twist: we were distributed compute units for Russia's space program

I think many of us older folks have fond memories of staring at that green screen for hours on end with no backlight and by some amazing coincidence, we're all also probably near-sighted. Super Mario Land was a solid and fun launch title, which I got good enough to beat in an afternoon whenever I was bored. And there were even a couple RPGs in the first year, one of which was Selection: Erabareshi Mono which has the word "select" in two languages for some reason? I did play the English version The Sword of Hope as a kid and vaguely remember wasting hours trying to figure out how to get to the next area. It was a weird RPG/Adventure game hybrid that brings back nostalgia tears that are a bit too salty to consider for GOTY.

Random encounters and puzzles were perhaps not the best combination

I have to say looking back at things in context, the Game Boy was an amazing piece of technology for its time. Yeah sure, everything is various tones of green but putting the lack of color aside, the sound chip is amazing. Check out some of these rocking tunes!

Makai Toushi Sa·Ga（魔界塔士Sa・Ga）

Release Date: December 12

I played the WonderSwan Color version of the first Saga game. As far as I can tell, it's pretty much the same except of course, with you know, color. Localizers fucked up as they often do by calling it The Final Fantasy Legend. No, it has absolutely nothing to do with Final Fantasy. 

It's a pretty simplistic RPG but what can you expect given that it's the first RPG on a portable console (that I know of). It's a cool game and pretty fun especially considering that it came out in the first year of the GAME BOY. The setting is definitely not your normal fantasy RPG, as you can clearly tell from the rocket launcher and chainsaw on the cover. We definitely need more RPGs with modern weapons other than Metal Max.

While I haven't played many GAME BOY games, it's generally because they are too simplistic for my tastes. Being one of 2 RPGs released in the first year, this is definitely my GOTY for the system as it was actually pretty fun even today.

Verdict: GOTY for portable gaming

PC Engine

The PC Engine really started hitting its stride this year, offering what in my mind is undoubtedly the most technically advanced titles. Even super expensive PCs didn't offer CD quality music yet. There are a ton of titles I still need to play through so I'm sure I will be updating this section over the years.

Valis II（ヴァリスII）

Release Date: June 23

Overall, I liked Valis II though parts of it definitely got really frustrating near the end. While I wouldn't say that it's one of the best action games, once again the PCE CD technology shines here so I would say this takes GOTY for Soundtrack until I find something better.

Verdict: GOTY for Soundtrack

Ys I & II（イースI・II）

Release Date: December 21

The first two Ys game on PC were so choppy, I wouldn't really consider them playable. For me, the PCE port is the first platform where it was genuinely fun to play. While I had a blast with the PSP version, it would have been amazing to play this version all the way back in 1989. It's all about the bump for reals. Once you go bump, you never want to go back!

Verdict: GOTY for Action

PC

While I haven't yet had the time to really dive into the Japanese PC88/98 games, Sierra was still pumping out great titles such as Space Quest III: The Pirates of Pestulon and who can forget Hero's Quest: So You Want to Be a Hero.

The latter was especially highly regarded for mixing RPG elements into Sierra's classic ADV games and not in a shitty way like The Sword of Hope. I played the heck out of the later VGA remake as a kid and really enjoyed how your character class directly affected how you played the game. However, enough talk about Sierra, there's a new game in town.

SimCity 

SimCity from Maxis was definitely a highlight for yet more childhood nostalgia. To be clear, I was not part of a rich family with a Mac or Amiga so all of my time playing SimCity was the SNES version that came out a couple years later. And to be fair, SimCity 2000 is so much more superior and the Maxis game I spent the most time on.

Wow, this city looks like shit. Greg Abbott, are you playing games again?!

However, SimCity deserves GOTY due to pretty much bringing about an entirely new genre of games. Sure, you can dig up earlier sim games that probably have some aspect of city building but not one that included zoning, connecting power lines, managing traffic, etc., etc. As for me, playing this on the SNES was the gateway to hours of fun from SimAnt and of course, the freaking amazing SimCity 2000. Reticulate some splines, y'all!!!

Verdict: GOTY Overall

Other Games I tried

MOTHER

Release Date: June 23

MOTHER is finally available in English so the Jhipster smugness factor is gone but honestly, I did not enjoy this game at all. It feels limited on the Famicom especially compared to newer systems that were available at this time. GOTY for the category: "Thank god for save states!" Meh.

Verdict: GOTY for being overrated

Dragon Knight（ドラゴンナイト）

Release Date: November 1

Dragon Knight is definitely not a great game, much less GOTY. It's a very simplistic DRPG with a single party member and hardly any depth to the gameplay at all.

Butt (sic) if you think about the graphics, you'd be hard pressed to find anything that would tickle your fancy like this on say the Famicom. I'm a sucker for the retro style and comparing it to other games that came out in 1989, I'm afraid it really is one of the best looking games this year.

Verdict: GOTY for visuals "assets"

Games I plan to try later

FC

がんばれゴエモン2

西村京太郎ミステリー ブルートレイン殺人事件

里見八犬伝

山村美紗サスペンス 京都花の密室殺人事件

マルサの女

スクウェアのトム・ソーヤ

暗黒神話 ヤマトタケル伝説

ヘラクレスの栄光II タイタンの滅亡

ハイドライドIII

スイートホーム

Megadrive

ファンタシースターII 還らざる時の終わりに

ヴァーミリオン

PCE

コブラ 黒竜王の伝説

魔界八犬伝 SHADA

エナジー

凄ノ王伝説

神武伝承

天外魔境 ZIRIA

ニンジャウォーリアーズ

ガンヘッド

めぞん一刻

ワンダーボーイIII モンスター・レアー

鏡の国のレジェンド

ダブルダンジョン

ニュートピア

弁慶外伝

PC88

Emerald Dragon

魔晶伝紀ラ・ヴァルー

In search of GOTY for 1988

Here we go, 1988. While us proud American kids were deeply engrossed in mutant turtles and the 1988 Crystal Light National Aerobic Championship was in full swing, the Japanese console market was heating up with the PC master race Engine in its first full year on the market and the Mega Drive that launched on October 29 for the holidays.

Somehow I missed this on my TV Guide 

However, despite the newer, shiny consoles, the Famicom had just begun its peak of dominance with a whopping 142 titles and even 55 titles on the FDS. This is compared to just 21 games on the PC Engine and 28 Sega Mark III games along with 4 launch titles on the Mega Drive. While I'm not a big fan of the FC, I would never write something so cliché as "quality over quantity". It's hard to argue for other consoles when the numbers are so dominating for Nintendo.

PC Engine

Let's quickly go over the PC Engine's lineup which mostly consisted of a mix of action, sports, shooting, and other genres I'm not really into. There was only one RPG Necromancer, released in January. I did put in a few hours but man, it's pretty tedious. Will update when (or if) I ever do finish it.

Among the handful of shooters, the most notable ones are R-Type I and II. I rented Super R-Type on the SNES a bunch as a kid and got good enough to almost beat it. So I guess if I was a rich, Japanese kid I could have been playing at home a few years earlier. However, it's kind of lame that it's split into two parts. Overall, it's a good game but not a GOTY contender.

I like to stick it to the back. What? It's a valid strategy.

Also of note are the first two CD-ROM games released in December No・Ri・Ko and Fighting Street and needless to say, these first two games are not a good showcase for the new technology. I always did wonder as a kid growing up when everybody was playing Street Fighter II, what happened to the first one? It sucked ass, was what happened.

Yes, I did play this... and no I don't want to talk about it

Among all the games, Makyou Densetsu looks to be the most impressive technically, especially that sweet music. It basically looks like a Super Famicon platformer except of course 2 years before that console even hits the market. Still, while visually impressive, doesn't seem likely to be GOTY.

Sega Mark III

1988 effectively marks the end of the Sega Mark III besides the last game Bomber Raid released in February of 1989. The Sega Mark III has a paltry total 85 games for the system, which is surprising given that the Sega Master System lived on with far more games overseas over the years.

So far, I've only played through one game: Hoshi wo Sagashite. It was a family-friendly and decent ADV game I suppose. Nothing special in my opinion.

Another notable game is Maou Golvellius, an action RPG ported from the MSX version released the year prior. I remember the snakes from this game playing it at some kid's house back in the day. The controls are kind of stiff but given the paltry library on the system, it does bear mentioning. At least the MSX2 updated version has a nice intro but $128??? Jesus.

Some poor sap payed that based on the cover art

I loved the Master System as a kid but objectively, it falls far short of the FC. But don't worry, Sega fans, here's another console you have to buy!

MEGA DRIVE

As Sega has historically always done, they launched another console before owners of the old console could get much value for their investment. Not much to really comment on given the paltry 4 titles released in the first year. Space Harrier II is cool and all but not a GOTY for me.

I have to say though as a kid, I wanted a Genesis and Altered Beast SOOOOO bad when it released state site, I would dream about it for weeks. To this day, I never did own a Genesis.

Oh nice, a screenshot of broken promises and depressing childhood

I supposed I do now finally own the arcade version of the game now on my Astro City Mini. It only took like over 30 years. Thanks mom and dad, I didn't need you guys after all! But then we knew that all along didn't we?

It's as good as I remember playing at the store's demo kiosk as a kid but not GOTY level for me. Ok, let's move on (per my therapist's suggestion).  #NotBitter

PC-88/98

The early PC gaming era is really nostalgic for me because it still has that distinctive old-school yet mature feeling that caters to a completely different market (that also incidentally happens to have jobs and money). And by "mature", I mean more advanced writing and scenarios intended for adults not porn, you sickos.

It's all about the music, right guys?!

Not to mention, the still graphics were way ahead of consoles. Check out the intro for Digan no Maseki for instance, this game is definitely on my radar to check out. Will update here at a later date.

Sorry, I haven't played it... yet

At this point in time, I still have quite a ways to go in terms of covering the PC games of 1988... who knows when I'll have the time.

Famicon and Disk System

At last, we come to the big pile of shovelware... err I mean timeless classics loved by all the privileged kids whose parents bought them an NES and $120 games (adjusted for inflation). Bitter, me? Nah! Yeah, I haven't played even a tiny fraction of the almost 200 games. So far, I've only played Ripple Island. I'm just really not into the FC except for what I have to admit is GOTY.

Super Mario Bros. 3

This is undoubtedly going to be the first and last Mario game I would even nominate as GOTY because I don't even like them. But damn, as much as I hate to admit it, 3 is fucking amazing. Not only does it blow every other FC game out of the water, I still sometimes confuse myself into thinking it's a SFC game.

It's leagues above the first game and the lame remix sequel (aka Lost Levels to non-jhipsters). The Tanuki suit, P-Wing, flying battleships... there was no other platform game that could even touch it. Ah yes, the fond memories of holding the down button on the white hill for 3 seconds. Yes, I even watched the infomercial... err I mean movie The Wizard as a kid at some point. As much as I hate to admit it, I find it hard to believe I will find another game in 1988 that was better than Super Mario Bros. 3.

Verdict: GOTY Overall

Other games I tried

Dragon Quest III

Release Date: February 10

To be clear, I did not play the original version that was released on the Famicom. The SFC remake was so well done and looks so much better that I don't really feel any need to replay the original version. However, putting aside the graphics and music, given the great story that completes the first trilogy, I would be surprised if I run into a better RPG. Sorry, Final Fantasy II, you lose this round.

Verdict: GOTY for RPGs

Snatcher

Release Date: November 26

There's a lot to like about Snatcher. I mean sure, it "borrows" ideas (to put it mildly) from movies that are pretty obvious. But it has amazing music and graphics for the time even on the original PC-88 hardware. 

It's ok to show nudity if we don't know what gender they identify as

The only reason why it's not GOTY for me is because Act 3 was never released on this version. By the time the game was finally finished with SD Snatcher and PC Engine CD, it wasn't as impressive. Still, the music holds up even today, listen for yourself.

Verdict: GOTY for Soundtrack

Games I plan to try later

妖怪道中記

リップスティックアドベンチャー

ファンタジーゾーン

オールドヴィレッジストーリー

リサの妖精伝説

Kyoto Ryuu no Tera Satsujin Jiken（京都龍の寺殺人事件）

Long time readers may remember way back when I realized that I could play old ADV games on my phone (duh). I figured, hey this should be easy! Whip out the phone in a free moment, load my save state, and play a few minutes at a time. And here we are, almost a year later, I'm finally writing about the first Yamamura Misa Suspense title on the Famicom. Needless to say, this was NOT an easy game to get through.

To be fair, the rest of the game does not look this but c'mon

Now, I'd like to think I'm pretty fair in judging games in their proper context and timeframe and according to Google, this game came out at the end of 1987 (December 11 to be exact). Ignoring my disingenuous screenshot above, the graphics are not bad for the Famicom. On the surface, this game looks like it could be one of the better early murder mystery ADV games on the console. Unfortunately, in reality, it sucks so bad, it makes the first Tantei Jinguji game look good, which is quite a feat.

Hi, nice to meet you. Oh, don't mind the frickin' corpse behind you!

There are two major problems with this game, the first being the goddamn awful menu system that requires you to go through multiple steps just to ask a fucking question. Select the ear icon, pick the person to ask, pick the topic, pick the question and start all over for the next question.  Honestly, how hard would it be to remember your menu position?

Well, as long as there's some cleavage, who cares about mechanics?

At this point, I'm a hardened retro gamer so I can stand bad mechanics and some frustration if the story is good but that's where my major problem lies with this game. I dunno if Yamamura Misa's novels are a hundred times better but the whole premise of the game was just... stupid. It starts with the first murder victim holding some petals with letters on them and so the rest of game is filled with character names that just so happen to use those exact same letters. Be prepared to be constantly confused about who is who as you talk to Minako, Namiko, Minao, Naoko, etc. because yeah, it's totally believable that every suspect's first and last name just happen to be perfect anagrams. And also, why are you, a freakin' game designer, responsible for investigating the murder instead of the police?

Why the hell is this my job? Is this because of #DefundThePolice?

The game was so boring, I feel like I don't want to bore my growing audience with an equally boring blog post about it. I'm going to be honest here and admit I totally followed a guide after a few hours of navigating the god awful menu. There is one trick where you have to call *69 to find the last caller on someone's phone, except it's the Japanese version of *69, which I have no clue about. I didn't grow up in Japan. I'm a Jhipster. If I was Japanese, I would just be a "gamer". Well, a Japanese gamer so probably less trolling and death threats.

Oh yeah, you know I'm a real game journalist now that I'm trashing gamers. Don't worry, no matter how shitty some gamers might be, at least they're shitty for free instead of trying to make a living off of it like those game "journalists".

A gamer girl? Nice! Oh wait, Famicom? Pass for lack of taste.

Score: 1 so boring I inadvertently started ranting about gamergate for old times' sakes out of 5

I'm sorry, what were we talking about again? Oh right, this game! So anyway, it's terrible. Don't waste your time with it. Still, I read online that the next Yamamura Misa game is better so I'll probably stick with the series. The one I played on DS seemed pretty good but more on that in 2024.

Scale
0 - Awful
1 - Bad and not worth your time
2 - Has some flaws but still enjoyable
3 - An average enjoyable experience
4 - A great game
5 - Masterpiece of a caliber only found very rarely

GOTY for 1984

I figured 1984 was a good year to start for coming up with Game of the Year since it's the first full year after the Famicon's release (July, 1983). Despite never owning a Famicon or NES, surprisingly I've played quite of few of games including Pacman (let's pretend Atari version doesn't exist) and of course, Duck Hunt. The most surprising part is I had friends at the time with a NES. As for Sega's SG-1000, well, I'm going to be mostly ignoring it as I'm not really into arcade ports.

I've even played games such as Nuts & Milk, which instantly brought back nostalgia tears with that darn music you can never, ever forget. Given that I DEFINITELY didn't own a Famicon as a kid for a Japanese exclusive title, I most likely played it on some unlicensed, shady Korean console with 100 games on one cartridge. (This game technically first came out in 1983 for the MSX, Sharp X1, etc. but I played the FC version which is significantly different.)

Umm, yeah I owned this game... TECHNICALLY

Tetris

Release date: Sometime in 1984

Now if I were to stick with the Jhipster theme, I would probably pick some silly Japanese arcade port like Pacman for GOTY but I must remind you, a REAL Jhipster appreciates ALL games and is only particular about playing Japanese games in their pure, unaltered form. In terms of pure fun, I would have to pick Tetris as GOTY for 1984. Even though I have not played the original version, the core gameplay remains unchanged from the original 1984 release as far as I can tell.

Yup, looks like Tetris but way more Russian
The highlight for me was playing against my friend on 2 player Tetris via that janky ass cable for the original gameboy. It even has the same dull green color scheme of the original so can't get more authentic than that. Right?

Verdict: GOTY runner up

King's Quest

Release Date: May 10

While I have tons of great memories of Tetris and it has a long line of puzzle games that expand and extend the original concept, King's Quest, or rather Sierra On-Line has far more personal significance for me. If you compare the games that came out around 1984, you can truly appreciate how revolutionary and ahead of its time the graphics were in King's Quest.

Believe me, for its time, this is fucking amazing.

I originally left this game out because I was a bit confused on the release date but this nice video explains that while it was shown in 1983, the official public release was indeed in 1984. So if you consider what games look liked especially as early as 1983, you can see why King's Quest is easily GOTY in terms of its sheer technical marvel and hey, it's not a bad game either to boot.

Whoa, an informative youtube video??? WTF is this shit?
While I did not play King's Quest around the time of its original release, to me, this marks a whole series of franchises and the golden years of a company that pretty much made up most of my childhood. Yes, I might not be retro hipster enough for the first King's Quest but I was there on my friend's Tandy (I was poor, remember?) with EGA graphics for Police Quest. I was also a fanboi of Space Quest and have fond (painful) memories of trying to get the mouse to work using HIGHMEM and various, ancient incantations from my AUTOEXEC.BAT and CONFIG.SYS spellbooks for the VGA version of Hero's Quest.

I did try out a later version of King's Quest on Steam. Sure, the story is a bit primitive and some of the puzzles are the usual type of stuff from those days that are pretty much impossible to figure out without calling the Sierra hint hotline aka "1-900-OHMYGOD-TIMMY-WHAT-DID-YOU-DO-TO-THE-PHONE-BILL!!!!" However, even today, it was still fun to walk around in a full graphical map and explore and... stuff.

Verdict: GOTY Overall

Other games I tried

The Black Onyx（ザ・ブラックオニキス）

Release Date: January

I'm triggered by the objectified male bulge

CRPG addict has the historical background on this first-person DRPG and there's plenty of other info as being one of the earliest RPGs released in Japan (though it was made by a guy called Henk Rogers). These really early DRPGs are frankly hard for me to wade through. I did try playing a bit of the moe-fied GBC version that's more my style but yeah, I've got a million other games I'd rather play right now.

Zarth （ザース）

Release Date: August

If only the rest of the game looked like this... (spoiler: it doesn't)

Somewhat notorious as a bait and switch, Famitsu featured the screenshot above, which of course everybody assumed was the heroine or at least more than a passing minor character. Entering text via Kana input on a PC88 emulator proved too much for me so I watched a let's play on youtube. Can I join the cool kids crowd now?

Showing all the best parts of a game?! Trailers NEVER do that!

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Release Date: September

A text adventure game that I remember giving up on in about 5 minutes back in the day. I am a Douglas Adam's fan so I tried playing again via flash but this game is brutal. PASS

> fuck this game
I type this command in just about every text adventure game I've played

Dragon Slayer（ドラゴンスレイヤー）

Release Date: September 10

Yikes, I did not play this version but not GOTY

Nihon Falcom's 2nd ARPG. I played the Saturn version for 20 minutes, plenty of time to get a feel for the mechanics. It's a great game for masochists I guess. Ugh, not even as good as Ultima I.

The Death Trap（ザ・デストラップ）

Release Date: October

Square, where is the sports bra patch per the ethics dept?

Notable for being Sakaguchi's first game from Square and the first ADV I've played so far with multiple endings.

Wingman（ウィングマン）

Release Date: November

Unlike Zarth, the rest of the game DOES look like this

Notably unlike Zarth, this game features a whole slew of great art and is the most visually impressive game so far for the year. Once again, the Kana input kind of makes this game impossible to beat without a guide. According to a random Japanese blogger, the guy that produced that one image for Zarth helped out.

Verdict: GOTY in visual and graphics

Hydlide（ハイドライド）

Release Date: December 13

If I was born like 10 years earlier and rich, I might've have enjoyed this

Yeah, yeah, this game gets the usual unfair flack from non-Jhipsters (AVGN, etc) due to  late localization but in the proper context, what's a better ARPG from 1984 or earlier? Certainly not Dragon Slayer at least. I can't stand scroll-hell PC-88 action games so I tried the Famicom version (1986) and it's playable at least with save states. The amount of EXP seemed really low and level progression tedious so I probably won't play through it but let's give credit where it's due.

Hokkaidou Rensa Satsujin Okhotsk ni Kiyu（北海道連鎖殺人 オホーツクに消ゆ）

Release Date: December 21

Unfortunately, the PC-98 version doesn't keep that clothing with improved fidelity

What a way to close out the year. Of course, this was when Yuji Horii was fine with showing his true pervy self. I played the PC-98 version but the story stuck with me after I navigated the pain in the ass maze at the end.

Verdict: GOTY for story and narrative

Ripple Island（リップルアイランド）

Continuing on my late "OMG, my phone can emulate old consoles!" discovery thread, I also recently finished Ripple Island. This is a perfect contrast to Hoshi wo Sagashite... because it was released in the same year but on the Famicom. Unlike the doable game by Sega, this is yet another FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE to beat ADV game from SunSoft just like Dead Zone.

FamiCan, like NintenDon't for positive Jhipsters

There's no way I was going to spend hours getting stuck trying to beat this without the help of a guide. Let's all just agree that I don't have enough time in my life to waste and no I'm not talking about having trouble finding time between life's responsibilities any more. I'm literally talking about how much longer I have to live now that I'm old.

Thanks Jacob for putting it all into perspective. Time to play some 30+ year old games!

Ripple Island, in my opinion, is virtually impossible to beat without a guide though maybe slightly less impossible than Dead Zone thanks to the removal of those really specific menu options like "place", "open", "pull", and "pour self some whiskey and cry about squandered youth". The game is split into 5 areas and the first area is super doable. You just gotta walk around, talk to a few folks in the town, pick up your girl, and drug what looks like a gopher. (Whew, good thing PETA didn't have Jhipsters back then!)

Fuck you stout, weasel, whatever you are

As soon as you get past the gopher asshole blocking your way, the King tells you about some lost treasures blah blah defeat evil emperor etc., etc. Then onto Area 2 where the shit hits the fan. To start, you have to knock on one certain tree to get some acorns even though it looks identical to every other tree. You know, there's an unwritten rule in ADV games that necessary items should be distinguishable even if it's just a few pixels. But nope, no respect for the genre here. Hey, why don't you try just knocking on this random tree, identical to every other tree in the fucking FOREST. What, you didn't try every possible action on every possible background item?

Welp, you're fucked. Hope you got a password handy!

Once you know what to do, the game is pretty short so I guess that means it's ok to get completely stuck? There are several points where if you screw up, there is no way to progress, for example, trying to hit on the female fox (you sicko). Another example is not dyeing that fucking white flower red, which by the way is completely hidden in some random bush. I loved (sarcasm) how they bait you with the red flower you can never reach on the cliff. Can you imagine, buying this game at full price on release, and getting forever stuck in Area 2, after playing for like a couple hours? Well, I guess if you were rich enough to be buying Famicon ADV games on release, you could probably afford the strategy guide.


Score: 2 Where is the "fuck" option? What, this isn't a PC88 hentai game? out of 5

Excuse me?? What about my panties?

Anyway, with the help of a guide, it's a cute game with nice visuals and several endings (thank god for save states). The story is simplistic but that applies to every console ADV game I played so far on this generation (PC88 Master Race for the win!). You travel with a cute girl, talk to animals, and ride a giant flying squirrel. What more could you want?

Not even deserving of a squirrel seat? See, this is why we have Incels today.

Scale
0 - Awful
1 - Bad and not worth your time
2 - Has some flaws but still enjoyable
3 - An average enjoyable experience
4 - A great game
5 - Masterpiece of a caliber only found very rarely

The Legend of Zelda（ゼルダの伝説）

Well it's the end of the decade and what better way to end it by playing a classic that is now over 33(!) years old: Zeruda no Densetsu. What a great way to make myself feel freakin' old that is! Yes, here at Jhipster blog, us humble gamers take pride in not playing all that fancy new shit. I didn't buy any new games this year and put them into a hoarder box still sealed and untouched. Nope, totally did NOT do that.

Anyways, I was working on my 1988 GOTY list, checking out Fire Bam on the FDS that vaguely resembled Zelda II and then remembered I never played the first one and so here we are a few days and 7 hours of gameplay later and I'm happy to report that this 33 year-old, out of shape beer belly, middle age crisis Tesla buying game still holds up really well! And no, that description has absolutely no bearing on my personal appearance whatsoever!

Getting off my fat arse to switch to Disk Side B not shown here

This Famicom Disk System launch title really does justify buying an FDS at the time in Japan. The poor Japanese kids wouldn't get the FC version until 1994, years after the Super Famicom was already out! Sure, you have to flip the disk and deal with loading, but it's an amazing game for its time and even more so considering it was one of the launch titles on the system. Now, I obviously haven't played every game before 1986 but I have to believe this is the first action adventure game of this type.

"1 star, don't speak fucking french" -review on Amazon Japan

The title screen has a quick summary of the setting and story in English, I guess because it looks cool? Amazingly, it is grammatically correct and gets the point across. At least they were nice enough to ask you to look at the "book" in their customers' native language. I'm assuming they're referring to the game's manual.

Which button do I press to see this book?

Fortunately, due to the re-release of this game on the Famicom mini console, you can read a beautiful scan by Nintendo themselves (how nice!). I took a look at the English version and they "erroneously" translated Zelda's wet nurse Impa as a "nursemaid". Talk about discriminating against a perfectly legitimate and reputable profession. Time to go wild on Twitter! #CENSORSHIP2019 #BOYCOTTNOW

Kanji for "breast" + "mother" = "wet nurse". See, Japanese is so EASY!

I've always been intimidated by this game as you have pretty much almost full reign of the overworld map with no clear direction on the next destination. There's no giant rock blocking most of the way here until you get the right item to progress, this is old-school. However, playing with a guide, this game is probably just as fun as any of the more modern Zelda games. I don't feel bad about using a guide (sparingly) because honestly some of the hidden shit screams "please subscribe to Nintendo Power" marketing to me. For example, I don't think there was any hint on how to find the Magic sword.

Sure this one was easy to find but try to find the Magic Sword (Google time!)

Once you know which trees to burn with the candle and get a better sword and tunic, I found the difficulty was pretty fair though most of the bosses are pretty easy. I mean of course it is, you play a character that can burn a fucking tree with a candle for god's sakes! The hardest dungeon is probably the 6th level. That weird jelly enemy that steals your magic shield was SO ANNOYING.

The fact that you can only save when you die also really made it hard for me to put the game down (literally). I played the GBA version so no sissy save states or "life of luxury" mode for the privileged kids. Nintendo nowadays is all kid family friendly with the, "oh maybe you should take a break" messages. However, in this game, after you beat a dungeon, you get back all your health as if to invite you to keep playing and that's what I did instead of going to work or being a responsible member of society. Great game, thanks Nintendo!

Score: 4 breast moms out of 5 (7 hours to beat)

Great innovation! Ok, time to make like 20 sequels now!

I have to hand it to Nintendo here. They managed to create an entire new genre on a system launch title, which is really impressive. The open world exploration, smooth and fun action gameplay, this is a game that really wouldn't work on the PC-88/98. Ys doesn't come on PCs until a year later and it's choppy as hell. I missed out as a Sega kid, and only vaguely remember the snake from Golvellius at some other kid's house but I'm pretty sure it's not as good as this game.

There's also great replay value with the second quest after you beat the game for the first time. I haven't played the second quest yet but I still think it's amazing that they included a remix of the whole game. They certainly don't do that anymore at least for free. (Hard mode DLC only 800 yen!)

I definitely think for 1986 in terms of innovation, this deserves a 4 star great game score. The only minor downside is the fact that you need a guide and a lack of variety in the music. The overworld and dungeon themes are great, they didn't grate on my ears even after hours of gameplay. But those are the only two songs you hear the whole game except for the intro screen, the last dungeon, and the ending credits.

Scale
0 - Awful
1 - Bad and not worth your time
2 - Has some flaws but still enjoyable
3 - An average enjoyable experience
4 - A great game
5 - Masterpiece of a caliber only found very rarely

In search of GOTY for 1986

Oh my god, as if to make up for the dearth of games in 1985, 1986 can be pretty much considered a gamer's paradise (if you were rich) of the 80s. The Famicon Disk System launched in February and pumped out some mega hits including Zelda as a launch title. Meanwhile, the PC Master race was not to be outdone either with tempting titles from both sides of the Pacific.

As for the Famicon, it's still firmly in the camp of arcade style games that are designed to make you want to murder somebody, for example fucking Goonies. Now I loved the movie primarily cause of the smart Asian kid with the gadgets but the game not so much. I played a bunch of the Famicon games released in 1986 like Goonies and Kage no Densetsu much later with that shady 100 games-in-one cart Korean console and well, needless to say, I wasn't impressed.

Fuck this game, fuck it to hell

As for me, besides some odd titles I've played on other people's expensive PC hardware (C64, etc.), this was the start of my childhood nostalgia rose-tinted glasses of the mighty Master System. While early shooters are kind of dated now, at the time I played the SHIT out of Astro Warrior. That and of course Space Harrier are the games of 1986 that made up my childhood. Now, I didn't have/rent these games IN 1986 (duh, these are Japanese release dates) but these are the games I grew up with probably around the late '80s. Yeah, pre-orders and scummy resellers weren't really a thing in the golden age.

As for Space Harrier, while the vanilla arcade port came out in 1986, I believe I must've had the later 3D version cause I remember killing my eyes with those glasses. Come to think of it, that might have something to do with why I can't see shit anymore. Ah, the good ol' thrilling days of rampant lead paint and potentially life-threatening toys before all this Obama death panel government interference!

We wore these while licking lead off GI Joe figures but somehow still not as dumb as SJW millennial kids nowadays

However, I'm not a dumb kid anymore and have far more sophisticated tastes, so let's see which games have the best boobies... er... I mean have the best expression of gameplay aesthetics... and... interactivity... and stuff....

Family Computer Disk System

I bet the game looks just like this!

There's a lot to like in the FDS's offerings in 1986 that are obvious contenders for GOTY, mainly Legend of Zelda, Akumajou Dracula (aka Castlevania for the non-Jhipsters), and Metroid. That's quite a hefty lineup for a peripheral, especially during its very first year on the market. For the serious Japanese gamer able to blow ¥15,000, it's a must own item as Zelda and Akumajou Dracula didn't get FC ports for many, many years. Metroid never got ported at all, you would have needed to wait till 2004 to play on the GBA!

I played through a few levels of Akumajou Dracula and I can't deny that it's fun. I certainly got good at avoiding those pesky flying Medusa heads. But not GOTY mostly due to my genre preferences.

Also on the FDS, I played an adventure game called Dead Zone. While the cover and art style outside of the game looked good, the game itself was brutally difficult and had a minimal story like many adventure games during this time. It was just so-so.

The Legend of Zelda

I was definitely late to the party with this one but I can add my voice to the consensus that the first Zelda game is a timeless classic that was amazing for its time. It's still fun to play today and very close to being my GOTY.

Metroid

Technically I haven't played Metroid yet but I did beat the GBA remake. It's almost a completely different game so I can't say too much about the original version. However, I just couldn't really bring myself to play through it after the oh so much better remake.

Zeta

I feel like 1986 is a good year to check out Champion Soft's lineup. Even though they have a couple games going all the way back to 1983, it's a bit too dated even for me. Zeta, on the other hand, is a very interesting idea of bundling a magazine with software in probably one of the earliest if not the first example of virtual idols. The software even has a contest for favorite idol conducted by sending in a postcard from the magazine (it might be a tad bit late to send now). The Disk Magazine was published biannually until 1987 with a total of 5 volumes. Considering the big cultural impact virtual idols have had in Japan from the likes of Hatsune Miku, Love Live, etc., Zeta is definitely a noteworthy game for GOTY just in historical terms.

This is vol 1, issue 2, the only picture I could find online

If you've never heard of Champion Soft, you may have heard of their brand AliceSoft, which I thought was the name of the company for the longest time. Champion Soft is still around and is the developer responsible for AliceSoft (the brand). So definitely a lineup to keep an eye out for in terms of Jhipster gaming history.

Space Quest: The Sarien Encounter

It seems Sierra On-line is still the dominant pioneer in the English-speaking adventure genre and boy, did they knock it out the park with the hilarious new series: Space Quest. Yeah, they also released the rather simplistic licensed game The Black Cauldron and yet another King's Quest but Space Quest is one of the series that I actually played and loved growing up, playing with my friend on his (rich) parent's Tandy on EGA graphics or whatever.

I loved the premise of Roger Wilco's anti-hero persona as you play a loser janitor on an accidental adventure to save the universe. As a bullied nerd, this was the perfect game to release some stress, er, I mean if I WAS a bullied nerd. Of course, as a super popular stud surrounded by chicks, I can only guess but I bet some poor nerd would have really enjoyed this game.

One of the best premise for an amazing series of adventure games

I would say in almost any other year, Space Quest I would be a no-brainer for GOTY but alas, 1986 is not just any year and there are some heavy contenders this time around. However, it at least deserves an honorable mention.

Alpha

Not to be outdone by the competition, Square released Alpha this year and so far I would rank it as their best Adventure game by far. Leagues ahead of Death Trap and Death Trap II, it features probably some of the best graphics (boobs) on the PC88 and it's not just ONE picture like Enix's scammy Zarth. In addition to some nice puzzles (boobs), it has a decent story (boobs), a nice OP theme song (boobs), and even a bit of animation. This definitely would have been a contender for GOTY if it came out in weaker year.

Like one nipple away from GOTY

Dragon Quest

While I gave the Famicon a lot of flack for being a mediocre platformer/action home console, there is one major exception. Even though all the cool games such as Metroid and Zelda were being released on the Famicon Disk System this year, surprisingly Dragon Quest came out on the regular ol' Famicon.

Reading on the Famicon? What is this? FDS wannabe??

There are countless "articles" written by some nerd in his mom's basement about how JRPGs are really CRPGs and how they are more linear because of story or some bullcrap. However, at least for our good ol' pervy friend Horii, anybody who's played Karuizawa Yukai Annai can see where Dragon Quest's roots came from. 

 

Pfft, so much for those Reddit/Kotaku/Polygon JRPG history "experts"

The final RPG portion of Karuizawa Yukai Annai is not so much linear, but better described as extremely primitive. You have to fight enemies in a certain order as the game balance is extremely tight and restricted. While DQ, being a full fledged RPG rather than just something tacked on the end, obviously has a lot more leeway in terms of balance, it still requires you to go to certain places in a certain order and weapon upgrades become available just when you need them.

I really enjoyed the tight balance and simple linear gameplay but I think it was more a product of simplicity and time constraints rather some stupid cultural bias as some dumb "JRPG vs WRPG" blogger would like to think. The fact is, with more ambition and budget, the next two sequels, especially 3, become much more open-ended as soon as you get the boat. Personally, it's why I hated 2 and still slogging through 3 because exploring without a clear goal with random encounters ain't so much fun when you're a busy adult. I'm sure it's great for kids to waste time on the ONE game they're stuck with for months, but no thanks, I'll stick with the good ol' simple DQ1.

While I played the SFC version, which has better music and sound so there is a little bias there. However, besides the much improved menu interface, it's still a similar experience to the original. While Zelda comes close or even tied, Dragon Quest is my GOTY for now mostly because I'm partial to RPGs.

Other games of note

VR remake candidate?

177
While I didn't try this game myself, 177 is a noteworthy game for perhaps being the first example of the Streisand effect in gaming. Though since no internet, the effect was a mere golf clap, this pretty simplistic and frankly bad game has the notorious distinction of being the first adult title discussed in the National Diet. No idiots, it's not some new diet fad, I'm talking about Japanese politics.

Apparently 177 is the law concerning rape and you basically just chase down a woman in the park and well... 177 away. According to Wikipedia, this game was practically pulled from the market after the Diet got wind of it. Pfft, silly politicians, I guess they didn't even know about Tenshitachi no Gogo released a year earlier, where one of the menu options is "rape". Due to the increased notoriety and the subsequent ban, this game is supposedly now a rare collector's item. Way to go collectors!

J.B. Harold no Jikenbo Murder Club
A decent detective story with standard PC-88 ADV menu action.

Suishou no Dragon
The other Square developed game in 1986, published by DOG. Maybe because it was crippled by not being on PC master race hardware, I thought it was just so-so.

Valis: The Fantasm Soldier
I played the PC Engine remake which was pretty good but the original 1986 release looks pretty rough.

Wingman 2: Kitakura no Fukkatsu
Not a bad sequel but there are better ADV games.

Ganbare Goemon! Karakuri Dōchū

I spent a few hours playing the first Goemon game given that it's a fairly extensive franchise. I didn't beat it but it was certainly one of the better action games for this year. Having small, first-person mazes was nice distraction. However, it does get a bit repetitive after the first few levels and there are no bosses or anything of the sort.

Games I plan to try later

道化師殺人事件
コスモエンジェル
King's Quest III: To Heir Is Human
マドゥーラの翼 レイラ

ハイドライドスペシャル

ワルキューレの冒険